Regardless of the pain that your ex has caused you, you might eventually find yourself in a place of forgiveness. This is even more important if you have children and are working together as co-parents.
Anger and resentment directed towards your ex can be unhealthy and leave you unable to move forward. Forgiving your ex following your divorce is one thing, forgiving yourself is something entirely different.
The forgiveness you give yourself is a gift. This important task is not for, or about your ex in any way, but more about allowing yourself to have peace. It can release you from the pain you feel and erase the burden of blaming yourself for the break up. The pain you feel from blaming yourself holds you back from enjoying today and tomorrow. Once you forgive, it is a huge step forward in self-acceptance.
You might need professional assistance in order to let go, move on, and understand the value of forgiveness as a positive tool for self-empowerment. Just because you forgive, does not mean you condone the behavior that ultimately led to the divorce. What it does mean, is that you are freeing yourself from letting it hurt you anymore.
Keeping your pain to a minimum and moving forward in a healthy manner is important to your self-esteem. Attorney Ronald Allen Johnston is a Beaverton OR family attorney who respects your unique situation and will work to make sure that you get what you need from the process. Click here to read more about our work in Beaverton OR.