Regardless of how this new “you” is dealing with the loneliness and independence of living alone, it is important to accept it. You may not always feel strong and it might be a never-ending struggle to feel ok with your new life, but you should revel in the fact that you are moving on in the best way you can. Losing the title of “spouse” is traumatic, and the rebuilding from this may take a long time. You likely will not feel needed in ways that used to make you feel fulfilled and happy.
One way to help replace what once was a feeling of unity and family, is having a celebration of who you are. Be proud of your talents and take up your hobbies again. If you once played a fierce guitar, but gave it up when you got married, dig it out and start playing again. This pride in something you do well can help you gain confidence and also remind you of the person you were before you said your vows. Your new “lonesome self” will not feel that way forever, and the day will come where you have moved on from your old life, whether it be with someone new or on your own. Either way, be confident in being the best “you” you can be.
Facing divorce can bring about so many emotions and a long painful process can make the experience more traumatic. To contact an advocate with your best interests at heart, click here.