Finding closure after your divorce will likely take you longer than you might think. That said, there are a few steps you can take to better your emotional well-being through this difficult time.
Here is the best advice that we can offer you for moving on:
- Try not to put yourself on a deadline for healing. Every divorce is different, and so is the healing process. Give yourself the time you need to move forward.
- Understand that it is ok to feel sad. It is important to allow this of yourself, just try not to dwell for too long.
- Forgive your ex. This is not a simple task, especially if you feel that you have been wronged in some way. If you can come to a place of forgiveness in your life, you may find it is easier to move forward.
- Realize that you might never get the apology that you want from your ex, and that’s ok. Some people keep waiting for an apology from their ex, even after the divorce. Depending on your situation, you might receive what you are looking for, just don’t depend on it as a means of closure.
- Focus your attention on a future with your children. You may have lost a future with your spouse, but the one you share with your children has not changed.
- Take the time to grieve the end of your marriage. Allow yourself to cry and mourn what has been lost in this process.
- Allow yourself to be excited about writing your own happy ending. Will you meet someone new? What changes are you going to make to better your life? These are things that can get you excited about moving on.
The quicker you get excited about your new life, the sooner you will find closure.
Ronald Allen Johnston is a divorce attorney in Portland OR who believes that every divorce is unique. Finding closure may take time, but it is possible to come out the other side a much stronger and more independent individual. Click here to read about why you should select him to be your ally in your divorce.