Ground Rules for Divorce

February 18th, 2015

When entering the divorce process, it is important to set some ground rules to help you make it to the end.

  1. It is very important to accept that you can’t change the person you are divorcing. If you keep fighting who the person is, your anger may fuel the conflict. While accepting may be difficult, the truth is that the person is not going to change.
  2. Allowing yourself to feel your pain allows you to deal with it.   Accepting that the relationship is over will help you begin to let go of it.
  3. Understand that there are two people in the problem. It is easy to rationalize and place all of the blame on your ex-spouse, but it is important to accept the blame that belongs with you. This can help you accept the person for who they are and just realize that the combination of your personalities just does not work.
  4. Make a conscious effort to not hang on to the person. This push and pull process can leave you feeling the hurt of the rejection over and over again.
  5. Resentment is a hard feeling to let go of, but if you can find a way to forgive you can put yourself in a better place.
  6. Make yourself listen; forcing your opinion is no longer necessary. The conflict can only be dissolved through acceptance and communication in the divorce process. If the person could not change while you are married, they are likely not going to change now.
  7. Make concessions even when you don’t want to. Divorce is about finding a solution that works for both parties. You simply cannot expect to get everything you want and leave your ex spouse with nothing.

To learn more about your rights or if you want to set up your initial divorce consultation with Ronald Johnston Law Click to contact us now.

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