As you cope with your divorce, you may find yourself using self-talk to motivate your healing process. When done correctly, self-talk is a great way to boost your self-confidence and work through your problems, but sometimes this form of coping can have drawbacks.
Part of moving forward following a divorce, is telling ourselves things that will soothe our anxiety and ease our pain. When this self-talk comes out in the form of lies, we can be hindering our recovery with negativity.
Here are a few lies that you might be telling yourself following your divorce:
- I really couldn’t care less about what happens to my ex. In reality, you likely do care and likely always will…
- I am completely miserable when I am not with my kids. Yes, you may miss them, but you likely do not hate it all of the time. Sometimes you even welcome the break. Try not to feel guilty if you enjoy yourself while your kids are away.
- I will never date or marry again. While depending on your situation, this might be true, in many cases it is not. You are likely saying this to protect yourself. Wait a while; you could possibly change your mind.
There are many other lies that we tell ourselves to cope with divorce, and the best advice we can give is to stop and try to move on in a healthier manner.
Ronald Johnston Law is a divorce lawyer in Portland OR that specializes in helping you move forward after a divorce. Click here to read about how.